Category Archives: JUST CALL ME BOB

It’s been a lonely life

It’s been a lonely life.

Everybody is alone with themselves, sometimes – it’s the re-charge times in your life. You re-group, digest, process all the wonderful, and less so, experiences that touched you and you consider their consequences. And you get on with YOUR life.

That innermost core is our very, very own sacrosanct secret, a place where nobody gains access from outside – only God knows. That place contains a few “dark secrets”, which everybody has no matter how good you are in the eyes of the world. We’re all our own harshest judges when it comes right down to that core.

God is always there to hear our concerns, it pleases Him that we’re “trying” in the grand scheme of things. It is what makes you a saint. It is your Faith. Hence, you’re never truly alone.

Then there’s day-to-day life. Human life involves a lot of interaction and we all crave concern, both for ourselves and for others. Without the concern component, life becomes empty, no matter how much platitudinal interaction we have.

I have nearly completely abandoned the concern component for the “near” (how much “dear” is mandatory?). Two old sayings are illustrative here:
1) The jug will carry water from the well only until it breaks.
2) You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make him drink.

This is unfortunate, and I’m still wrestling with this. I jokingly say “sign me up for the Alzheimer’s study” – sadly, it sounds like a wonderful refuge to me. That is how close I keep getting to what I call capitulation. I’m developing a non-suicidal death wish as an alternative – I’m DONE.

I am not ALONE, but boy – am I ever LONELY!

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